I love how no one truely knows me even though I am an open book and will tell you pretty much anything about my life.
I feel like I should become devoid of all emotion because it would be better to not be able to feel happiness if that ment I did not have to feel alone all the time.
As I seem to be ending a second “friendship” in less then a year I do acknowledge that yah its probably me but when the only way that seems to get them to interact, respond to me with me, or even acknowledge our so called friendship is by me being a passive aggressive asshole that’s what I’m going to.
Everytime I send a passive aggressive message I always hope it will fix everything even though I know its just going to make it worse.
It helps me to talk to someone when I am trying to work through something, unfortunately everytime I try to build a support system for that I just get told I’m complaining in the end.
I hate consistently walking into a crowded room and feeling like I’m completely alone.
I’ve been told that I’m not a pleasant person to be around. I actually try very hard to be liked by everyone and to not piss anyone off, apparently I’m just a shity person no matter what I do.